Thursday, February 14, 2008

My Funny Valentine

So my Valentine calls me today, uh huh, and he goes, "Hey, baby, I'm going to lay my cards on the table. Are we doing the Valentine thing today? Because, you know, we don't always do anything for Valentine's day, and I got nothing. I'm just wondering, honey: Do I need to skip my run today and make a trip up to Godiva?"

And you know what, girlfriends? I am totally down with that conversation. This man gives so much to me that I do not need a cheesy Hallmark sentiment on a $4 card to know how much he loves me. I do love chocolate--but Mr. P doesn't wait for a special occasion to buy me some. Just last week he came back from the drugstore with one of those gigantic one-pound Hershey bars, which, BTW, is no more.

We were talking at the dinner table last night, and Mr. Peevie mentioned a wine that we had tasted recently. "I didn't like it very much," he said. "I wouldn't buy it again."

"But what if mom really liked it?" C. Peevie asked.

"Then I'd buy it, of course," Mr. P. replied without hesitation.

It's just a little thing, that conversation, but I made sure my kids paid attention to what a sweet, thoughtful, husband their daddy is. I want my boys to grow up to be that kind of husband--the kind that brings the love in small, everyday gestures as well as in the non-negotiable ways, like fidelity, and kindness, and respect. And I want my daughter to know what a great, supportive husband looks like, so that some day she'll choose wisely.

Let me tell you about some of those big and little kindnesses that make Mr. Peevie my Valentine whether he brings me a mushy card or not:
  • Every morning when he gets up at the crack of dawn to get ready for work, he resets the alarm for me.
  • He knows my love language is presents, and he takes many opportunities--even for no occasion--to speak that language to me.
  • He is the best apologizer in the world--not, as he says, because he has so much practice, but because he understands the importance of taking responsibility for your actions, and he genuinely cares about my (high-maintenance) feelings.
  • When I have messed up, he forgives me often, quickly, and without looking back.
  • He tells me how much he appreciates what I do--my cooking, my parenting, my (ahem) work around the house.
  • He tells me specifically what he loves about me.
  • He is a great dad to our kids: engaged, loving, homework-helping, bedtime-story-reading.
  • He still, after 23.75 years, laughs at my jokes.

No one could ever ask for a better Valentine. I adore you, Mr. P.

4 comments:

Linda said...

This is a lovely posting. I feel the exact same way about my Valentine, Mr. Bruce, with whom I've done little on the holiday itself for the past 15 married years. It's a little like Christmas and Easter - why do it only once a year, when you can do it everyday?

E. Peevie said...

Thank you! Good point about Christmas and Easter, too. And Thanksgiving--every day should be Thanksgiving.

jeanie said...

I am still the President of the m. peevie fan club- as you know. However I want to add how good it is that you tell him why you appreciate him. We all love hearing why someone appreciates us! Do you guys give marriage lessons?

E. Peevie said...

jeanie, HA! Our mutual friend in Atlanta asked the same thing. The only advice I have is to marry well. Which of course, when you're 22, is kind of a crap-shoot. I got lucky--in the Presbyterian sense of the word, of course.