tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3247899948019262860.post3316201768087869879..comments2023-09-09T10:29:29.789-05:00Comments on The Green Room: What To Do About a Lying ChildAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17709842445396738547noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3247899948019262860.post-5108191073233177832009-10-29T08:19:01.947-06:002009-10-29T08:19:01.947-06:00I removed that comment because "Kevin" d...I removed that comment because "Kevin" didn't actually make the comment--I did. Weird. Blogger thought I was someone else.<br /><br />Anyway, Boosh, yes, parenting is a weird, impossible job. Worth it, most days.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17709842445396738547noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3247899948019262860.post-70525567797903764282009-10-29T08:16:05.215-06:002009-10-29T08:16:05.215-06:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14691167807098065202noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3247899948019262860.post-16082353054912249852009-10-17T21:26:37.476-05:002009-10-17T21:26:37.476-05:00Goodness...I'm not a parent (yet)... And readi...Goodness...I'm not a parent (yet)... And reading things like thus throws me head-on into the reality of what it's like to teach a child...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3247899948019262860.post-74911393428659352962009-10-14T11:48:34.870-05:002009-10-14T11:48:34.870-05:00Anon, Thanks for sharing your story and tips. You...Anon, Thanks for sharing your story and tips. You're right, the lying-stealing double whammy would be really hard to deal with, especially with the added factor of a parent modeling the exact behavior you want to change.<br /><br />I like how you associate the word "consequences" with good things--the consequences of telling the truth--and not just bad things.<br /><br />There is nothing more powerful at behavior modification than consequences. Punishment is sometimes a consequence, but it makes sense to me that the more logical and connected a consequence is to the behavior, the more likely it is to teach different behaviors. <br /><br />Writing the consequences of truth-telling v. lying is a great consequence!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17709842445396738547noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3247899948019262860.post-46775404711049963352009-10-14T10:58:35.798-05:002009-10-14T10:58:35.798-05:00My stepson dropped a big lie for the 3rd time abou...My stepson dropped a big lie for the 3rd time about the same subject - stealing. You think it's hard to sort out what to do about a simple lie, try figuring out what to do about the double whammy of lying and stealing. I'll preface this by saying that he is indeed a truly great kid with a bit of a troubled past with his real mom (which largely involves life changing lies from his real mom) that he's working through - hence the behavior issues from time to time. We increase the punishment each time - no dessert, no school hot lunch (which seems like a blessing, but not to him), and no DS for longer periods of time each time. We have long conversations about trust and I made him write a list on two sides of a piece of paper - one side listing the consequences of telling the truth and the other side listing the consequences of lying. He dated it and we kept it, hopefully to never bring it out again, but just in case... You have to be consistent in the enforcement. At a certain point, natural consequences aren't enough and punishment helps hammer the point home. I'm pretty sure he's getting it this time (at least I'm hoping really hard that he's getting it this time).Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3247899948019262860.post-79032763670924547522009-10-13T23:36:52.540-05:002009-10-13T23:36:52.540-05:00Yes, Bucky. No punishment for lying--but for sure,...Yes, Bucky. No punishment for lying--but for sure, a consequence.<br /><br />I believe more in the power of logical consequences to change behavior than in punishment in general, but especially for lying.<br /><br />Mr. Peevie--yes, a personal best. 11 minutes faster than he did four years ago. He is not getting older, but better.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17709842445396738547noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3247899948019262860.post-57282705557103021842009-10-13T23:15:48.815-05:002009-10-13T23:15:48.815-05:00You won't punish M for lying? Am I misundersta...You won't punish M for lying? Am I misunderstanding you? Or just in that instance of the paper, to get her to finally 'fess up?<br /><br />Buckster<br /><br />p.s. How did Mr. Peevie do on the marathon? Reach his goal...perhaps do a personal best time?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3247899948019262860.post-77632102434521230642009-10-12T23:41:15.244-05:002009-10-12T23:41:15.244-05:00The truth is most kids lie to get out of trouble. ...The truth is most kids lie to get out of trouble. The only remedy that I know of is to make the punishment for lying harder than the lie. It isn't easy, but you have to be consistent. If they've got half a brain eventually they get it.cubehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13788126579896276199noreply@blogger.com